Stream Blog - Page 6 of 66 - Janet PearlmanJanet Pearlman | Living in the Stream of Yes

January 17, 2024
by Janet Pearlman
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Frustration and Opportunity

We can recall instances when someone in our social spheres “drives us crazy.” Inside us we call, “How can they keep saying that? They are ignoring my advice!”

If we choose, we can pursue the opportunity to explore our emotion and thought pattern that has gotten triggered. Perhaps we can soothe the frustration in ourselves. Isn’t it fun to contemplate the inner power we can liberate if we focus there!

The Illustration

Karen lay in quiet time at end of a yoga class. Her mind wandered to her husband who won’t take a supplement she had recommended. K then recalled how this morning the two participated in an online consultation with the nutritionist from his medical practice. That person suggested what Karen had already pointed out to her dear one. K cried in her thoughts, “Why won’t he listen to me?”

The Assistance

Donna tells Karen, “Well, if you want, you could use this moment of frustration to benefit yourself.

What is at the heart of your strong reaction?

Is there a part of you that feels lesser because he did not heed your advice? At the core do you want more recognition as a source of important information?

You want more respect. What if you offer that more and more to yourself? You know your nutrition information is worthwhile. We don’t know his reasons for not responding to your ideas. His reasons for not listening to you have nothing to do with you! You can honor yourself right now.

Karen listened attentively and was willing to consider that possibility. This star knows it will require practicing to change her reactions.

When we feel an emotion like that, we have had a button pushed. Most of all of us do that at time. We can see an opportunity to know ourselves better.

Do you have a story from your growth process that resonates with this account? Please share it! Questions? Please put it in the comments. You will get a response!

About the Author

Janet Pearlman is a spiritual teacher, counselor, healer and artist. These posts demonstrate everyday applications of the path to greater self knowledge and mastery. Opportunities for greater empowerment abound in the moments of our lives. As we all go for operating from a centered and loving space, we are creating a world where peace can prevail. In her forty-six year journey of self-discovery, Janet has deeply studied the teachings of Abraham-Hicks, Ernest Holmes, Inayat Khan and more. Janet offers individual sessions by phone and in person. Please contact her at jpearl555@earthink.net to arrange an appointment.

January 10, 2024
by Janet Pearlman
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Pay Off in the Flow

Follow your inner guidance, stay connected to the Forces of Good. We can experience some fun developments popping up to support us.

Today’s Example

Demi includes many health practices in her daily routines. She drinks a cup of tea made from an individual Chinese herbal formula morning and evening.

At the most recent visit to the herbalist, the practitioner recommended our star take saunas regularly.

Demi did not feel drawn to saunas and admitted she knew nothing about them. What facilities in her local area featured saunas? How much would such a service cost?

The next day this heroine got adjusted to the idea of getting saunas weekly and did research on how she could make this happen affordably. In her review she came down to a couple of choices and neither was particularly appealing. And she was not giving up.

The second day after the suggestion her schedule called for D to teach her weekly yoga class. After the class she chatted with one student explaining her dilemma about finding a sauna.

The student pipes up, “Oh I own a sauna in my house. Would you like to use it?”

Within two hours Demi had a sauna in this newly discovered resource. Wow

As the student and teacher fleshed out their expectations of the offer, Demi felt in awe: not only did the sauna host expect no payment, Demi was provided with a key to the house to access the sauna anytime. Demi indicated she would always text first and understood that Sundays would not work well for visiting.

Go with the Flow?

If Demi had reported on her prospects for getting saunas on that second day after receiving this “prescription” she would have told such a different, less advantageous account of the story.

Instead, a wonderful offer popped up out of the blue.

On day one D resisted the sauna idea and researched it. It sure sounded inconvenient and pricey. By day 3 an opportunity arose where getting hot would be easy. 😊 Pretty wonderful!

Point of this Tale

We are wise to attend to each moment and to stay open to the unexpected. Forces of Good may just surprise us with better outcomes than we envisioned.

About the Author

January 4, 2024
by Janet Pearlman
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Talking Ourselves Down from the Edge

We all acknowledge that we have moments of upset. Even those on the path of more empowerment experience times of unwanted habits of thoughts running, perhaps anger or fear. This piece shows the process of how to grab the reins of that bucking inner horse and return to an easy trot through life.

A Chart to Help

Following Impulse, 24 x 30, Acrylic with Texture, $525

Over her lifetime Gerry had often offered assistance to others. She had gotten attention in her family by catering to the needs of others—so she did that quite often. Now she was practicing to create herself to be more balanced—and that would involve lots of care for herself into the mix.

In this account our heroine catches herself leaning too much toward a caretaking agenda and beginning to feel neglected herself. “Wait a Minute!” Gerry exclaimed inside, “I want to change my thinking right now.” How to do it?

This dear woman grabbed writing materials and made a table with two columns.

In the left column our star recorded the distressing thoughts that were flowing through her mind right now.

In the right one, G stepped into the role of counselor, as though she was assisting another, and steered toward what she really knew and wanted to embody.

On the left: “I am afraid I am running a habit involving the care-taker role. I have held my own needs back and focused on the needs of others. I am distressed to notice this,” thought Gerry.

On the right: “It is ok to have habits from the past. Deep patterns take a while to change. It is ok to see and know this piece of myself.

I am part of Good, and I cannot separate myself from it. This means protection for me!

I take care of myself easily and well. All is well.” Soothed G.

On the left: “I feel angry and afraid.

In the past I did not care for myself as well as I might have. Am I getting anywhere? These habits are back!”

On the right: “It is ok to observe behavior of a habit. Habits change bit by bit.

Now I am learning to live in more ease and balance. Happy much of the time, this demonstrates progress for sure!

I am on a human journey experiencing and growing, safeguarding my own needs. I craft my lessons into words that assist others. That feels great!

I participate in an expanding universe. As I feel something I don’t want, I gain clarity on what I do want.”

Gerry paused and realized she did feel less fear and anger now. Her breath came more readily. Oh good! Our protagonist had returned to the present.

Postscript

Gerry wanted to feel better for herself. G had been upset after interacting with a certain person. As the Good would Flow, though Gerry had not contacted this person at all regarding her feelings, the friend in this story wrote in the next day and appeared to have shifted her position toward greater harmony with G. Isn’t it fun to notice that a change inside our star had an effect outside her on another.

Please delight us all and share a story from your life where you calmed yourself down. We stay connected and inspire one another easily. YAY!

December 26, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Living the Spirit of Christmas All Year Long

During the Christmas season some folks feel more joy than usual; they put focus on beaming love to their family and friends, maybe their communities and beyond.

Many put their focus on feeling good—repeat slogans like “Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men”

In these posts we read about our personal power to create our lives so that we experience these good spaces very often, much of the time. Perhaps this represents the essence of what has attracted so many of readers here: Living the Spirit of Christmas All Year Long.

Flowers II, 24 x 30, acrylic on canvas, $595

What are the steps again?

Notice what we are feeling.
If not feeling good, to what can I shift my focus to feel better?
If we feel quite poorly, how can we distract ourselves diving into the flow of life?
When we are balance, what can we appreciate?
We can stoke our own tank with the wonder of life.
Then act in life filled with the inspiration that easily comes to us when we feel good. No big effort.

When we focus ourselves on good, good things flow to us. 😊

On purpose we perceive Innocence and Good

Dottie attended a family meal with a friend’s extended family. One woman Mattie, a cousin aged in her 50’s, felt drawn to share about herself. Mattie sells her art and makes a decent living from it. “Isn’t it great that you have persisted to reap the pay offs you have now?” remarked Dot.

Dottie exclaimed, “How wonderful that you express beauty and others get to have it in their homes.You contribute so much!” D told her. “Your steps to overcome obstacles have enriched the whole world!” Mattie felt delighted to receive that perspective.

Our star Dottie easily shared this positive feedback, seeing a bigger picture of Good. For D this view flowed through her effortlessly.

In our current culture so many of us have been trained from early childhood to assess whether we are right or wrong, good or bad. (We dearly want to be viewed as Good.)

Closely related, many of us want to avoid feeling “not good” and are trained with guilt a-ready and armed with blame for others or ourselves.

What a powerful balm to hold out innocence to those we contact, to reflect to them that they are ok as they are in this moment.

In the process of walking through life looking for the Good in others, we are training ourselves to increase our capacity for seeing positive more easily.

The more we expect to see Good, the more we do, and the more and more Good stuff flows to us without effort. What a powerful win-win!

Bottom line: why do it? We find it feels fabulous to see the Good. And Good flows to use as we feel wonderful.

In today’s world in most social circles, we make a transformative contribution when we speak the Good of others. Our words forge a meaningful connection to anyone with whom you share them.

Ring in the New Year with a Resolution to Increase Your awareness of Good and speak it. Please share some of what you notice with us here!

December 20, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Calm Take Another Look

Do we notice when we are assessing a situation and we are also feeling “not good”? If we slow down, we may notice that we are feeling quite afraid, resentful, or other negative emotions. Then we are wise to tak another look now that we feel more balanced. The difference in view may be remarkable and pleasing!

Example 1

Candy’s landlord sold the lot next to where Candy lived. When she heard this news, our star’s adrenaline spiked and she felt in danger. Soon the new owner would construct a house next door.

Two flows converged: the building project did not begin for months and thereby Candy had more time than at first she thought to gain a more balanced perspective.

Candy’s Personal Goals

C knew the principles she wanted to follow.

Reach for calm
Reach for appreciating
Look for good things to flow
Feel as though she already had what she wanted.

Our star wanted to use this episode to build strength and live as much as possible in joy.

What could this dear woman do? She distracted herself by enjoying her life, appreciating many aspects: creative pursuits, friends, activities and more.

Time Passed

Five Months later our heroine spied a front-end loader in the neighboring lot. The next week the construction began.

On the first day of construction Candy walked over to chat with the first workman on the scne. In that conversation, she learned that the Leader of the project was open to saving part or all of the lovely tree on the lot. That tree is a wonderful feature out C’s picture window in her living room. Is it possible the builders might save the tree? Very cool.

Then on day four, our star saw that her garden was not in harm’s way. The retaining wall stood a good distance from her garden’s border. The construction will not touch Candy’s flowers. Oh another dreaded aspect not happening.

Wait a Minute. None of what had scared Candy was happening! In her mind she had made things worse than they were. How could that happen!

Example 2

Dahlia spent a week quite frazzled. She had pain in her body; her walking was impaired. She wanted to order products from one site and she knew she had recently participated in a group order from a different company. Quickly she checked the group purchase. “Oh. where was it?” she cried. She did not see her selections in what appeared to be what was submitted as the group.

So harried from her current set of circumstances, she took a breath and kept going. D prepared material on the second site, did not have enough for free shipping and put off consideration till later.

Days passed. In a much more balanced frame of mind, Dahlia swung back around to check the group order again more carefully. Oh my! In her haste D had missed that the group order had two parts and her stuff was included in the second part she had not seen. She had walked around for many days thinking she had been left out and would miss out on those items. Wrong! Dahlia’s products had been ordered. Her distress was for nothing, a result of collecting data incompetently when upset.

When she made a calmer perusal, everything was fine.

Do you have a story of a distressed review that turned out to be distorted and false? Did you distort your perceptive lens in haste or worry? Please share your account and how you used it for your growth. We love sharing this path.

December 13, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Take Power Instead of Feeling a Victim

Those of us increasing our personal power are building new neural pathways moment to moment. These new pathways represent new strength in our ability to focus.

When we are born, we are guaranteed that choosing our focus will be part of our life experience –we will touch up against some things we do not want. Then we turn to focus on what we DO WANT so we get more of it.

We get what we hold in our thoughts in this attraction-based world.

In this account Georgina is experiencing something that she definitely does not want. What can she do to build strength instead of magnifying the upset?

Often G reached for being connected to Source Energy. She felt good vibes flow from her heart and frequently spent time enjoying her yard. Daily she would create various projects: crafts, home improvements, garden.

Close by down the street, a male neighbor drank heavily and spoke loudly. It had happened last week and this time the invective pounded the air, accented by a menacing din of blaring music.

Our heroine lost her composure for a bit, triggered into a distressed and depressed reaction. In despair, Georgina wailed in her head, “This is my home!”

Pause. Wait a Minute. This Star wanted to come from higher consciousness. She called for help to a friend who would help her know what to do from greater self-mastery.

This guide began, “At every moment you retain your connection to Source Energy. We need only bring it back into our awareness. We make our priority our own nervous system—regaining that “feeling good” place. First put some focus on calm, perhaps distracting ourselves with something pleasurable. Certainly, offer ourselves time to recover.

This assistant called up the inspiring words of Howard Thurman, influential author, philosopher, civil rights leader. “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” https://libquotes.com/howard-thurman/quote/lbn4k5i

Georgina felt deeply afraid and distressed by the anger and noise on her street. The work with her nervous system to feel more calmly and contented required focus over days into weeks. The habit would show up she’d whine in her head, “But I want to work in my yard!” Building strength this dear woman did not dwell there, pivoting out of that victim mentality again and again.

Moving on, G found ways to soothe herself and knew she was taking power in her mindful steps to recovery. Her ability to focus where she put her thoughts represents her power, and she kept choosing to build resilience in how she uses her consciousness.

Once she got feeling better, options to continue popped into her mind, she could:

Wear earphones and play desired music for our own ears.
Put special attention on the beauty surrounding herself. Relish each aspect—the color of the flowers, the combinations, the textures!
Review strong positive memories.
Appreciate the many friends she has attracted.

Our protagonist pleased herself that she was growing from this unwanted situation. She was expanding her love for herself and her understanding of others. Her courage expanded too. With delight she embraced the continuous practicing needed and G loved expanding her capacity for love.

Did you find this piece thought provoking? What bubbled up for you? Can you think of more approaches to strengthen ourselves under similar circumstances? What do you do for yourself?

November 29, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Compassion and Self Care

We want to protect our loved ones from hurt. If a dear one has borne a loss, we would love to “be there for them.” In some circumstances we can become overwhelmed with the effort to meet our own standard of kindness we set. As we feel exhaustion, we are tempted to become resentful. How do we stay empowered? Read on for an example of what to do…

Tatiana’s Story

Tatiana had a special birthday coming. This year she created quite a schedule of plans to celebrate. She had grown children and decided she would like them to visit, both together. Her plan calls for this visit to precede her party—the kids would miss that, because she wanted to devote all her attention to them and not party details during their stay.

Then she went off on a short plane ride trip to commemorate another’s special day. Off she flew with her husband to participate in a young person’s party.

When Tat returned, she dove into the details of her party. That required a lot of her focus. While juggling those balls, her sister wanted her assistance in planning a family holiday, a separate event from the other birthday related festivities. Did she want this or that? Could she make this date and time, cook and bring certain dishes, etc?

Oh dear T was exhausted and considering this stuff felt a strain. Tatiana started to feel victimized by this sister. Her resentment started to rise.

Wait! Our star wanted to support her sister when she could but the sister was giving no regard to what T was busy with, her guests, and now her party. Wow said T to herself, “I feel out of brainpower to handle all of this.”

She called for help. Her wise friend offered this:

“Tat, in this situation you can ask your sister for special dispensation. I recommend speaking directly to your sister and describing your dilemma. Possibly you could say, ‘Please give me a few days until my party is complete. After that I can offer some input to what you want to plan. Any plans requiring decisions prior to that she is authorized to make without my input.’

You feel compassion for her. You love her. And you will support her again. But right now, your self-care requires that you set limits so you can care for yourself and your arrangements.”

Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Yet in a state of overwork, stress and emotional confusion we can allow negative feelings to project out onto others.

Let’s stay empowered. We can be kind both to ourselves and others around us by stating where we are and what we need, by setting some limits. In this story T was considerate of her own state and assumed the best in her sister too, i.e. that she would understand and support her once it was made clear.

In another few days, Tatiana felt radiant after a very successful party. T hardly remembered the brief dip into overwhelm. She and her sister were doing fine.

Do you have stories on this theme too? Please comment and inspire us!

November 22, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Keep Going: Urgent Moments Can Resolve Easily.

Woven into the fabric of our living we will experience blips. It is guaranteed that we will experience what we do not prefer and then we realize what we DO prefer. Some events feel so urgent and yet as we persist, find some ease, resolution can come easily.

Constance and a friend went about the task of emptying a storage space, moving boxes and other materials out of one house to another. She did great on the flight of stairs, up and down, up and down.

When the process was nearly complete, Connie stepped out the door onto the front porch and felt stabbing pain. Oops, her foot had landed at the edge of a thick straw doormat, half on the mat and half off. Her ankle took a serious twist.

Y–ouch!

Trained in energy healing, immediately C put hands on her ankle for a few minutes. Generously her friend picked up the slack and handled what remained of this transfer project.

That afternoon the pain spiked. Our heroine tended to her injury with ice, natural remedies and a Jin Shin Jyutsu session.

In addition to the hurt itself, C admitted she felt frightened. Constance wants to remain self-sufficient.

Later in the evening, our star felt physical pain rise and fall and so did her fear. Alone, she cried for a couple of minutes and felt relief.

Wait a minute! C told herself this would pass. She was not alone in life! No! She was moving around even if for the moment it was a slow hobble. Knowing she could access the support of a naturopath for special herbal formula also helped ease her trepidation.

Experimenting with different ways to hold her body, this dear woman did reduce her pain in movement; the fear eased too. By bedtime she felt balanced.

Punchline: The following morning Constance arose and could walk easily. No pain from her foot– she could move erect and normally.

Constance was practicing her version of going with the flow. She has slowed down, put focus on her condition. She refrained from “pushing through” as some might advise and she did persist in ease.

Two days later, she had little remnants of her twisted ankle.

Wow– isn’t good to notice that she could recover so quickly! One might think pain means something really bad and long lasting is happening– it does not! Instead, soon Constance felt a re-boot, a kind of refreshment and in awe of how life moves through.

Let’s notice how Forces of Good was present the whole time. C felt resilient with the flow.

Do you have stories of situations that seem so urgent yet easily resolve? Please comment.

November 15, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Observing Fear in Romance

Gosh we load so many emotions into a male/female “romantic” interaction. With sharpened awareness we can learn about ourselves and our fears, we notice how trepidations cloud our perceptive lens.

Deana is learning more about herself, growing more cognizant of when she operates from balanced place and when she runs some emotional reaction. D wants to feel good 😊 wihle she creates a healthy growing relationship with a man.

The Example

Carl and Deana have plans for 12:30 pm to meet at the art exhibit. Then go for lunch. Two hours before the appointed time, Carl texts Deana to report his car is broken and he is not coming.

This would have been the fourth date between Carl and Deana. On the morning of the second date, he had cancelled the lunch date. Out of four dates this has happened twice.

After the change in plans, Deana carries on, accomplishing some satisfying tasks. This dear woman loved the beautiful day putting leaves in bags to store for compost.

As D ponders this scene, she feels a bit uncomfortable with today and the pattern of cancellation. Thoughts pop up: “Is she being messed with? Is she getting involved with someone who is frivolous and not a match for her level of integrity?”

Next morning Carl texts that felt awful cancelling like that. And he knows he has done that before.

Deana tells him she did notice this was the second time. Last time she had been pleased how promptly he rescheduled and then followed through.

Meanwhile this heroine becomes aware that her mind has turned negative and suspicious. Ah yes D knows she is thinking that way out of what appears to be protecting herself.

In her new way of thinking—is that actually helping anything? She decides, “No it is not. Why don’t I perceive this as a car blip.”

Shifting Deana focuses on keeping her own good mood. Star of this story prefers staying in the present moment over feels better than running thoughts of suspicion. Is she fine just as thing are? Yes, she is. In fact, she has much to appreciate regardless of this date or not.

The Next Event

Later that day Carl telephones her to make amends. He asks her for another chance to set up a meeting. Deana has maintained her own good mood and finds it easy to agree. The two arrange a rendezvous for the next Saturday.

Deana can more clearly discern what’s happening by maintaining her own balance.

We can invent threatening tigers with our thoughts. And we can marshal our personal power. If we are running fear or anger, we can shift our own thinking to remain calm abd happier. Where was that tiger anyway?

Want to share a similar story in the comments? Please do!

In providing an account we do so assist one another!

November 8, 2023
by Janet Pearlman
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Choose Love Over Guilt

For many of us in this culture family relationships can easily trigger feelings of guilt and obligations. In this post we offer some new thoughts on family and new strategies that feel better. Let’s take a look at the teachings which encourage us to uplift ourselves: choose love over guilt before reacting.

An Example with Janice and an Advisor

Janice had discovered her sister had been hospitalized and was not well. J had not known this dear sibling had been suffering hip pain for a year. Upon learning the news, this heroine felt uncomfortable—guilt ready to happen– and wanted to reach for an evolved response.

Our star sought advice about how to handle this situation. Janice consulted her friend Daniella who wants to live in balance and compassion as described in this blog.

Daniella knew the two sisters had once felt closer: they have not been communicating as much as they had been four years ago. In addition, like some families, they created fewer clan gatherings during the years when many stayed home much more.

The Counselor Responds

When D received the call, she felt clear and happy. This advisor began,

“In a recent interview Neale Donald Walsch, author of Conversations with God[1], puts forth that in the nature of the universe all of us are inherently, unconditionally loved from birth. Therefore, none of us needs forgiveness because in divine eyes we have not committed any transgressions. We are seen as completely enough and ok already. The Abraham Hicks teachings and other spiritual works espouse harmonious viewpoints. We can live into that!

“You feel hesitant to respond. Do you wonder if your sister had wanted you to reach out to her more during this period? Are you thinking she could have tried harder to contact you? This sister endured almost a year of discomfort without telling you or consulting you for information on alternative healing?

Janice, you are already using these teachings. I sense you feel an impulse to go into fear based thinking, but you also have in your mind: Skip thoughts of guilt, of not being enough, of what you or she ‘should’ have done.

You are mastering tuning into how you are already loved and you need not defend yourself. In light of that, you can make it ok that this sibling may not want your views on politics, health or medicine. That fact need not be taken personally.

You love your sister deeply. Forfeit any other commentary. Go right for expressing that strong affection.”

Janice Breathes Relief

Immediately, Janice allowed the wisdom of what her friend was telling her. J responded, “Oh yes, yes I see.”

Daniella continued, “You can go immediately to accepting her as you find her now. Soothing her comes easily to you.

Expressing your compassion flows out from you effortlessly.

You do not owe her ( or anyone else) anything. No hooks on you!”

Janice paused in silence for a moment, absorbing the words. “That was so valuable! Thank you! I might have reviewed ‘But why didn’t she call me?’ for a spell, but no I won’t go there. What a relief to release of all the past hurts or possible recriminations! That was dense and I can digest it.”

Take Away

We can realize that what matters most is to express our appreciation, acceptance and understanding of one another. So many squabbles about some kind of proving ourselves, one upping, blaming, even placating – we can drop all of that.

Choose Love Over Guilt! We are already loved. Nothing to defend or prove.

Do you want to ask a question about what you read here? Do you have a tale of your success in using this principle that you are eager to share? Please comment! We are on the path to loving our lives more and more!

[1] Neale Donald Walsch, Conversations with God (Hampton Roads Publishing, Inc, 1995)