Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Focus on What Feels Good


Fertile Dreams, 24 x 30, $525

Fertile Dreams, 24 x 30, $525

Wow what a fabulous tool we have to focus ourselves! I don’t think we realize the power we can wield when we put our attention on what we want.

Here’s the recommended process:

1. We are aware of how we feel.  How many of us space

out, push through and don’t know how we feel in a given moment.

2. If we don’t feel great, what then? Ease up. Perhaps take a pause and let our natural good feeling rise again. Lots of pay off to act from feeling good.

3. Maybe we can allow ourselves to be distracted from our “troubles,” and flow along n a new direction, one that feels better.

What can we learn from the following?

Example I

Lara called me in distress. One of the classes she teaches may not be renewed. A younger teacher is now favored by management for a session topic close to hers. Would she lose her gig? And another thing: at a family meeting her accomplishments seem to pale next to someone who was touting his productivity and successes. She felt lousy! Help!

“What might be fun for Lara to discuss?” I pondered by way of being helpful to this friend.  I asked her, “What were you painting on that vacation you just had?” This artistic woman loved looking at the island in the lake. So many perspectives were fun to put down. And the mountains — she knew several vantage points — different times of day. For longer painting stints, Lara brought a comfortable light weight seat with her. ( She delighted in her cleverness to do so.)

Additionally, our heroine met some new people and what they discussed was exciting to her. She ran into someone interested in food plans and was able to share what she knew– and it felt so good.

Before she knew it– about half hour or so, the one who had felt poorly, now felt animated and lively. What was the secret to help her?  Directing attention to an aspect of her life that was going well, that she loved to discuss.

Example 2

Penelope asked for a get together to become better acquainted. When we first rendezvoused, she explained her fatigue and low energy. She had had a poor night’s sleep.

We exchanged some basic facts of our lives. As P shared,  she reviewed her circumstances with some chagrin,  pointing out how recently things had not flowed well.

After a bit of listening to this downbeat dear one, I wanted to have a bit more fun, add zing to my afternoon. With animation I talked about how I love to live what I talk about, through my day noticing if I am using the teachings that are important to me. I said, “When I teach, I admit that I catch myself frequently wanting to shift my perspective to a more positive one, telling stories of what and how I’m learning.” In this moment I was putting my focus on what feels good to me.

The effect was like a spark connected with a pile of dry grass– VAroom!  Penelope launched into exposition about people who inspire her: a man who leads young men from impoverished neighborhoods; folks who are innovating, creating new companies and services and more. Soon she was articulating wonderful things that had happened for her in the last year, appreciating much of her good fortune. She got so much happier, more energized with a big smile on her face.

How did I help? I talked about what makes me feel good. That inspired her, and she reveled in what excited her.


What power there was in focusing on what we like!  In both cases I led conversation toward topics that feel good– asked a targeted question,  explained what gets me going, described my personal journey in terms of love and uplift.

I love planting that kind of seed.

We can do this for ourselves of course. None of you readers need this from anyone outside yourself.

Focus on the following: what do you love? what is going well? who do you find easy to love?  What are positive aspects of someone who you find difficult? What are some successes you enjoy recalling?

Be the one who notices what you feel and if you can go higher.

Create new habit of thought and bask in the pay offs!

Do you have questions or reports? Please comment! It feeds the flow of inspiration!


Leave a Reply

Required fields are marked *.

(Mission statement here).