Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Noticing Fear as Empowerment


Each day we are becoming more aware of the feelings and thoughts that arise in us. As we heighten our awareness of our feelings, we can wield a new level of power.

When we become concerned or fearful, many of us have the habit to DO SOMETHING. Adrenaline pours into our bloodstream and we feel a drive to address this threat.

When we feel fear, we fill our minds with some image that fuels the fright, definitely something unwanted. If we create the new skill of taking a pause, if we can say to ourselves, “Wow this is fear. What do I think will happen?” We get information about what unwanted we are MAKING UP or projecting.

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With the pause, we then have the opportunity to envision what we DO Want and to invent a different scenario than that threatening picture. How do we get to wanted? We have been learning what to do

Reach for feeling better and keep picturing what we DO WANT.

Perhaps some illustrations of how a person can use this life changing capacity.

Example #1

Timothy rented a place to live. With permission from the landlord he had laid out some money to fund a repair. This man wanted to see his money compensated promptly.

The owner suffered a serious health condition. The daughter helping her was inexperienced at carrying out all the responsibilities associated with the owned properties. Then the son of the landperson (brother to the daughter) experienced a hospitalization from a significant accident.

Tim felt unheard and discounted, his message lost in that family’s problems. This man wanted his money back! He felt more and more concern.

At first T envisioned losing money and suffering. That mental picture stoked his fear. In this man a voice cried, “I have to act to take care of myself!”

Here another way to perceive this:

Surrounding this, there are infinite possibilities of outcomes. Many of us have been trained to let these emotions run and then dictate our responses.  New suggestion: This hero could take a pause.

Here is what Tim tried. He declared to himself, “Wait a minute: I want to get clear what I DO WANT. I can imagine full compensation as the family gets back on their feet. The son will come home, the owner/mother will feel better and clearer. The daughter follows the instructions of the experienced, calmer lead.”

This dear man can use his energy to hold that vision. He can get in tune with the flow of the Universe. He need not push because he has heightened emotion with more phone calls and letters.

Timothy did wait and let some time pass. Then the owner felt improved health and mood. He interacted with her and then he easily made his points and received the agreement and cooperation he wanted.

Example #2

Lottie knew that Windows 11 upgrade was available on her computer. This gal had not realized that one day Windows would put up a screen, blocking all others, and inform her she must choose to download it now or decline the upgrade altogether.

Yes, the way Microsoft took over startled and concerned her. In her mind this new software might prevent her from using her system to teach an online class that was on her schedule for 12 hours hence.

In that concern our star fueled an upset and without consciously realizing, began out picturing inconvenient and troubling outcomes from this upgrade.

With assistance from tech friends, she receive advice to let it download and the installation phase would come later. This understanding allowed her to get a good night’s sleep in those intervening hours.

In the morning Lottie was given the option to postpone installing the new software and she chose a time and date a day later. This meant she was fine to teach her class.

The mental image of problems and obstacles for the online class did not materialize.

This dear woman awoke to realizing  how she had been afraid and with her imagination projected a scenario she did not at all want. Now she exercised the option to picture what she did want if she took that power. The evening before, she had let her fear sweep her up and make undesired and unconscious predictions.


We can play with this and see what changes we can make as we live our days. We might say, “Oh I am feeling an uncomfortable worry. What if I tuned back into Well Being and instead put focus on what I prefer. Let’s make up what I would rather see.”

What if we notice our arousal (concern, fear, and the like) first only as a indicator? We can become aware and take a breath. The discernment becomes a tool to fuel our imagination for more wanted scenarios?When we feel concerned, we are envisioning some future outcome, activity, that we don’t want. What if we are clued in that this is an opportunity to picture what we DO want instead?

Want to share some times you have done this or harmonious stories from others? We have the strength and willingness to do this more and more. YAY us!

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