Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Kindness to Self Helps to Find Lost Things


Being kind to oneself has one pay off not often contemplated: one can find lost items more easily. Some folks have the habit of beating themselves up for mislaying a possession.

Speaking kindly to yourself internally works better for “stuff” recovery! Here’s two real life tales:

Tale I

Leeann could not find the orange beaded bracelet. L loved that piece!

Crofton Spring, 12 x 16, $395

Crofton Spring, 12 x 16, $395

She looked “everywhere,” getting a bit upset. Inside this dear woman felt the habit voice rising up accusingly, “What an idiot! You lost the ___thing! What’d you do with it!”

Pause, breathe. Leann reads this column and she recalled dimly at first that things go better when she remembers she’s ok.

Leann rested and realized something: The bracelet is not that big a deal to her. She thought, “What really stirs me up is thinking I am incompetent, that self-blame. If I let go of that — it is just a bracelet I can replace.”  Oh, that felt better.

In that moment L stayed on her own side. It felt good to find that kindness. For Heaven’s sake she soothed, “I remain a stellar person!”

That first day our star gave up looking for the bracelet. She made it alright to not know if it was really gone or misplaced. Our heroine visited with friends, enjoyed herself, basked in good food and sunshine.

In a day or two, while packing her tote bag, she saw a pocket she rarely uses and there was the bracelet. Leeann found it easily when back in balance.

Tale II

Karen was searching for her brown cowl top in her closet. She proceeded through each hanger slowly a couple of times. In not seeing it K began to feel aggravated.

Pause, breathe! Our heroine remembered this universal law: if I fill my head with the fact the thing I want is “lost,” then it will likely stay lost. If I feel peace, remember my goodness, then it is easier to find what’s missing.”

Bless her she moved to the kitchen and prepared her lunch. Later on, when she returned to her wardrobe, the brown cowl top was right there in front. Astounding. Easily right there.

What a different life when we are kind to ourselves! So much fun to find lost things!

Please comment: I love hearing how these principles work for you!



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