Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Shifting Perspective   

Hues of the Blue Ridge, 16 x 20, SOLD

Hues of the Blue Ridge, 16 x 20, SOLD

I like to see through the eyes of love as much as I can. When I do this, I see each person seeking to express Good, doing the best they can.

When I become caught up, triggered, upset, I deviate from that practice.

Sometimes that view might become a habit, and I find irritation and frustration instead of Good. Isn’t it great when I can find my way back to balance and ease of seeing as Source Energy sees. Read one person’s story below:


Josey is married to a wonderful man whose family has property in the mountains. When they use that cabin on the compound, the group eats together in the biggest house where the parents dwell.  Food is offered generously, and the assembled brothers, sisters and cousins often number 15.

When Josey visits, the eating is hard on her. She has a special food plan and often none of the prepared dishes work for her. Over the years, she had wished that the hostess would accommodate and cook something that she can eat. “Even, a pot could be set aside for my use,” she mused,  “to quickly cook up what I want.”  No, each time Josey carried over a container with her own vittles, feeling a bit neglected.


This year members of Josey’s extended family, cousins from her dad’s side of the family, were traveling on the east coast and planned to meet up with her and her siblings while in the area. The cousins, Matt and family,  made reservations without careful research of the geography region– and whoops their hotel was still an hour from her.

“Oh my,” cried Josey to Matt, “why don’t you stay at my house?” Launched now in the concierge role, our star got busy preparing her house to put up four people. She cleaned for hours, then invented places for all the folk to bed down. Got air mattresses, inflated them, found linens. After the whole day of work she sat down to rest.

Then it occurred to her- what would she feed all these people? And what did they eat?

Personally she is currently on a very specific food plan. Her siblings, too, were going to pop over to join them for a lovely family meal. Those people are each individual diets different from one another.

She consulted with her sister, made some adjustments– the sister volunteered to deal with feeding people. Josey is saved!


Josey was struck with a realization as she took a break. Her husband’s family, especially the mother, was faced with feeding lots of people. It had never occurred to our heroine to see the situation from the hostess’s point of view.  It would have been so much work, a strain really, to figure out meals for her visitors and family.

The dear provider of nourishment would be overwhelmed by dealing with special needs. Even with all her all the growth work, it had never occurred to Josey to reframe this before. Da Dah now it is so clear that it is silly to feel the outsider and neglected that she had to meet her own particular needs for eating.  That mom needed to keep all that meal preparation doable for herself! To shift perspective feels so much better. See the mother in law as doing the best she can.

In a way this is a simple story. Doesn’t it really pack a wallop, though. Isn’t it profoundly life-changing  to look for ways to feel better at times when we feel put upon!

Do you have a tale to tell about how you changed your mind and felt better? We all would love to hear it. Comment!

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