Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Choosing Thoughts

In these blog posts I encourage readers to notice thoughts and choose ones that feel better. Here is an account how one woman did select where to put her focus and how it worked for her.

The Incident

Marlayna had been practicing becoming aware of her feelings and thoughts.  

Woman with Dream, 10 x 10, with Texture, SOLD

Woman with Dream, 10 x 10, with Texture, SOLD

Meditation helped as did feeling good much of the time.

On a summer trip she was visiting family when one member, Sarah, spoke to her with an accusatory tone. M had enjoyed two long, fun-filled days, packed with activity, and she felt exhausted.

Just before the outburst, Sarah had shown her photographs lined up for an exhibit. Sarah exclaimed, “You were silent through that show! Do you know you do that? That subject matter may not be your favorite, but your slience felt awful to me. You always are quiet when I run a slide show! I am never showing you one of my pieces again!”

Our heroine was stunned and horrified. Actually she admires Sarah’s photography. M had no idea that she was that quiet and that she had hurt the artist.

Immediately M apologized, and in that moment Sarah pushed it away.

Our dear one did speak to a third family member who might have a chance to convey her sincere regrets that evening.

Next morning Marlayna and Sarah were able to speak about her pictures. M offered praise and validation, and S seemed able to accept it.

Choosing thoughts

In those first weeks after this happened,  when M thought back on it, she felt hurt. Those initial words from Sarah felt like an attack.  In short, our star had gotten triggered into habits of thoughts from her younger life, ones loaded with emotion.

Oh my, though on the surface she did not feel upset, she discovered that she felt a pull to review what did not feel good. She caught herself telling this aggravating story in her journal.

M cries, “Wait a minute! I am recounting a time that brings up feelings of anger and revenge. I don’t want to do this!”

Our protagonist is on a trip with tons of fun stuff happening.  She woke up– why not appreciate all that’s happening instead?

(Remember ease.  Best to calm yourself,  get your mind on something soothing just after such an experience. Then, when recovered, try what is described below.)


Art museums, photograph exhibits, beach trip, canoe rides, sunny days, great companionship, fresh fish and more.

Wow listing what was going excellently felt SO MUCH BETTER.  Holly Moley! What a big difference!

Marlayna really experienced the power of reaching for thoughts that bring up good vibes!

Great lesson! Pay off for waking up and shifting!

Do you have tales of how this mental adjustment worked for you! Please comment! We uplift one another!







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