Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Building Self Esteem

Good Vibe  Pastel, 24 x 30 9-20-2010 10-33-55 AM 450x600Feeling worthy founds a life of feeling good. Contrary to the conventional wisdom, it is not selfish to feel good. From feeling good flows the impulse to contribute to the world in big and glorious ways.

Readers may be thinking, ” But I don’t feel particularly good about myself?”  Perhaps parents were critical or disappointed in how the child turned out. Now as an adult, what can someone do to heal those wounds? How can someone reaching for feeling good talk to that inner self  with far more kindness and positive regard?

I hope to share some of the many methods I have used over the years to build my self esteem in this blog over time. On my mind today is one technique I use very frequently is to make a list of some positive aspects relating to me. I like personal ones. As I create the list, good feelings flow for me. I write what comes easily to mind. I am reaching for aspects that feel good when I think about them.

( It may happen that things I am disappointed I am not come to mind. If it does, you can record them in a separate list and keep reaching for the good feeling ones.)  If the list feels incomplete, rest for awhile, perhaps a day, week or month and then continue listing.

The process of creating the list produced juicy feelings. When I go back and reread the list, I also feel good. In my own development I review the lists when I feel lower than I prefer. In those cases I may be surprised that I have so many good things on a list. ” Oh yea, I forgot all about that!”  I am turning toward where I would rather focus.

Suggestions for Positive Aspects Lists include:

1. Times you were proud of yourself. including achievements, instances of kindness and more. Allow “small” items to be recorded as well as bigger ones.

2. Incidents when people who were proud of you

3. Positive Qualities of character or physical attributes in yourself

4. People who respect you and why

5. Instances when you have felt  respected

6.  Your skills, abilities, competencies with which you are pleased.

I read  and create lists like this very regularly. I am uplifted by them.

Perhaps readers will experiment with this tool and let me know if it produces results for them. Please send feedback to jpearl@streamofyes.com. I love to hear from you.



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