Janet Pearlman

Living in the Stream of Yes

Refocus on the Good


During these times on the planet, we are going to see lots of changes; some may frighten us. Each of us can learn to be more self-supporting and to become more resilient as the fear rises up inside us. Gosh, those thoughts we create when afraid sure do sound true sometimes, eh? What are some tools for mastering these situations?

It is an Inside Job

Rosco View I, 24 x 30, $525

Lacey lived in a rental home adjacent to an empty lot. The landlord owned both.  One day her landlord informed Lacey that the adjacent lot was sold with development to proceed shortly. Our heroine continued to listen as the landlord continued though her being was filling with adrenaline. She wanted to remain controlled though she was feeling panicked.

L went into her home and phoned a dear friend, reaching for support. She said, “I need a few minutes of hand holding. Are you able to offer that now?”

“Yes,” replied her comrade.      

This star told the facts and as she felt her friend’s compassion, her own mind started to offer her soothing.

Self Comforting Arises

  1. Victor Frankl reported on his experience in the concentration camps. In one scenario, Frankl wrote that he glanced up from an outdoor work site and viewed a breath-taking sunrise. The other prisoners nearby quietly communicated to take that moment to look to the sky. Together they enjoyed that, a rare blessing for them.

Also in that piece Frankl recounted how much he dwelled on how deeply he loved his wife and how grateful for her he was. At the time in prison, this man did not know her fate, yet he persisted in filling himself that that deep affection and the gift she was for his life.

  • Recently one of Lacey’s respected leaders recommended everyone consider doing a parasite cleanse. L felt reluctant to do that, bided her time considering that option. Soon after, the leader sent out a recorded track on parasites. Lacey avoided that too, associating it with a fear laden subject matter.

When she shifted inside a bit, this dear woman decided to listen to that cut. In a more balanced state, L found the content no a big deal. As she spoke with her friend, our protagonist realized she had frightened herself with what she imagined about both the recording and the pending development. What was actually there was not frightening when faced. Oh.

“Good to Notice—I scared myself,” L blurted out.

“I want to watch what I make up about this sold land.”

  • Earlier in her life, Lacey had a painful break up of a long-time romance. What a tragedy it seemed in those months of the parting process!
    • Now looking back twenty years hence, so many blessings came after that event. So much good came from this “tragedy”.
    • What if the new neighbors from the developed land become wonderful friends?
    • What other benefits can L experience from what seems unwanted now?

Our star decided to remain calm and look for the good to unfold.


We can practice observing what we think. When we are frightened, we can pause.

Why not use a time-out to find some balance, get support, work in the garden or chill. Then what else could we think?

This phone call helped Lacey find some relief. True, the unknown future did not feel entirely comfortable. But she had found her patience, her perspective and her power.

Do you have an incident of calming yourself down that you would like to share? Please do offer it in the Comments section.

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